Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Fuck my life.

At the beginning of the week, I decided to start this whole eat-healthy-work-out-get-in-shape thing again.
My friend that is going to school to be a certified personal trainer is helping me with it.
I've worked out a bit for the past 4 days, and I've been eating healthy.
Now that it is day 4, I am grumpy as hell.

I miss junk food, I miss pasta and I miss being able to drink pop.
I'm craving carbs so bad right now, I just want to sit down and eat a whole pizza and box of fries and have some iced tea. But no.
Instead, my options are: chicken, soup or lettuce with a big glass of water. 
(Seriously, what looks more appetizing?)

I'm pretty upset right now. I know it's lame and I should just get the fuck over it, but I was raised on junk food and I have the biggest sweet tooth ever.
It happens about two times every year where I decide I'm going to try and lose weight, but I can never stick with it. It's just affecting my emotions more right now because I have been SO unhappy with how I look lately and I don't want to feel this way anymore.
I have serious issues with my image, one day I was late for school because I wasn't happy with what I was wearing and how my hair looked. So I changed about 10 times and tried a bunch of different hairstyles, and I still wasn't content. I ended up going to school anyways, but I was pissy all day. When I think I look like shit I'll worry about it all day. Most of the time I actually don't look that bad and everyone just thinks I'm crazy. I think I am a bit crazy, so I can't really blame them.
Basically, I started this blog so I could quack all I want and no one would have to listen to me whine and complain.
So now I'm going to make a salad and chicken and pretend it's something doughy with lots of carbs.


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